late bloomer

Stories, musings, and pictures… a little bit late.

Let’s Pretend

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Imagine, if you will, your nemesis. Now, make the following adjustments as necessary: sweaty pits, 70 extra lbs, a dip in the lip, constant burping, terrible grammar, and a propensity for creating drama. Just for kicks lets add: poor time management, poor decision-making skills, and slow learner to the list. That ought to do it.

Now, let’s pretend that you have been looking for, oh I don’t know, a new job. And you have been looking for a few months, applied to a few dozen openings, tweaked and tweaked and tweaked your resume some more… to no (or at least very little) avail.

Your nemesis, on a whim, decides to apply to an opening. One opening. In a week’s time Nemesis has been interviewed and offered the job. You are flabberghasted. After all, you did apply for that same position a month ago. At this point you may or  may not tell yourself comforting things like, “Yeah, well, I have more education. They probably don’t want to pay for that…”.

A few weeks go by and you get yet another rejection email. But alas, this one is different. This one says (to paraphrase – we ARE pretending, right?): We don’t really like you for the position that you applied, but may we suggest this one.

This one. This ONE. THIS ONE?! The one your nemesis turned down. The one you had to lie to yourself about to feel better.

Whew. Ok. That is enough pretending. I almost got worked up.


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